


Corpse autopsy

by Cherrydragon26



Series: Zombieland Saga- Alternate Universes and Stories [4]
Category: Zombieland Saga (Anime)
Genre: It's kinda an AU I suppose, There won't be anything to graphic, This fic is not for the faint hearted, but you should still look out
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-03
Updated: 2019-01-03
Packaged: 2019-10-03 13:28:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 889
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17284919
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cherrydragon26/pseuds/Cherrydragon26
Summary: When Franchouchou starts losing popularity the manager comes up with a crazy marketing idea.





	Corpse autopsy

**Author's Note:**

> This is written like a complete parody and nothing I say here is true. It is meant to be sarcastic and ironic, and it has a lot of black humor. If it is not your cup of tea, don't even try to read it. You won't like it.

It was a lovely day. A great day for an autopsy. I was pretty excited, because this was a completely new experience for me, and it would be the first time I ever attended an autopsy. My father always talked about the times he went as a kid, and he told me that he had always learned the most while watching them slice the corpses up. Now he is a famous doctor, one of the best and I also want to follow in his footsteps. So, when I was old enough I finally got the permission to go, and that is why I am excited about it.

I arrived there pretty early, and I was the one of the first ones. While we waited, we started talking among each other, and I met a lot of new people. It was fun and informative, and I got a lot of new contacts that could maybe mean something more in the future.

Th corpse and the doctors soon came by, and prepared everything for the show. I just couldn't contain myself, so I was fidgeting with impatience, while they were putting the corpse on the table. The doctor introduced himself and slowly started the operation. His name was Morty Filian. The other doctors were helping him by cleaning, giving him tools, and doing everything he tells them.

The doctor put a knife in the body and started to cut it with precise movement, only a professional doctor could have. For a moment I thought I saw the corpse move, but I shrugged that thought off, knowing it was stupid and impossible. We weren't murderers here, we were scientists, investigating the wonders of the human body and physic. The person laying on the table is surely dead. Without a doubt.

I continued to wonder at Morty's precise and quick slices, and also with frantic runnings of the other helpers, which made it seem like they were competing who will do what Morty asks faster or better. Maybe they were competing, who am I to judge?

However from the corner of my eye, it still seemed like the corpse was moving with every action the doctor partakes, and it made me uncomfortable. Why was it doing that? is it because of some medical reason I am not aware of or something completely different. Morty and the other medical sisters ( later I recognized the helpers were are girls, so they were probably medical sisters) didn't react to it at all so maybe it was a normal reaction?

Yeah, I am probably worrying too much, I should just relax and enjoy the show. And as soon as I thought that, the doctor seemed to have finished the autopsy, and he was taking of his plastic gloves and the mask covering his face. I looked at the corpse, and was surprised to see that it wasn't finished at all (the autopsy). The doctor hadn't done the most important part! What the hell is happening here?

One of the sisters gave Morty the megaphone, and when he took off the mask, he started to shout in it. "Hello, everyone! I hope you enjoyed our show! So please instead of coming here, come to the Franchouchou concert! We even have live corpses! Who move and sing and dance for your entertainment! Isn't that much better? To actually watch an alive dead man? A real zombie?! Isn't that the stuff of dreams? What do you say people are you in?".

The other nurses took down their masks and showed their ugly faces. They were half rotten and eroding which clearly showed they were dead before, but they are alive now. Somehow. They also took on some weird poses, that idols sometimes use, which just made this whole scene even weirder.

But that was not the worst part of it. The worst part was, when the corpse laying on the table stood up, smiled and waved at us. The corpse also turned out to be a girl, who jumped up from the table and shouted at us:" Please visit our concert next time! I promise you won't regret it!".

There was a wide spread panic attack, which made people run like their life depended on it ( and maybe it did, who really knows?). I was frozen for some time, while people shouted, screamed and punched their way out of the room. Above all the shouting, I heard the doctor (who probably wasn't the doctor), say something to the pink haired girl very loudly:" Wha? I haven't hurt her! Zombies don't feel pain! Yuugiri is just fine!".

After that I could finally move my legs, so I slowly stood up and walked out of the room. I suddenly felt my stomach rumble, and I puked everything I ate today in the hallway.

_Damn I am never returning here again! Actually I never want to become a doctor from now on! I will become a lawyer or something completely different. Wait, maybe an even better idea is that I pick a job where I don't have to be around people at all. Yeah, like, like....... Fuck i can't think of anything right now. Hah, well never mind now. It will come to me eventually. For now I just have to run away from here, and never come back. God help us all._

**Author's Note:**

> I don't own any of the characters just my own story.


End file.
